This was supposed to be posted on June 23rd ..day day we got to go home :) 

Unfortunately i am having problem adding pictures on my blog..(It's always something) but as soon as i fix this problem i will post a happy picture of Nadia with her survivor T-shirt on. 

 

WE ARE HOME!!!
If you are shocked that Nadia is home, 5 days after a major open heart surgery ...then you can only imagine how we feel!!I told a friend the other day.. that this is how it must fee like hitting the Lottery ..we are the LUCKIEST parents on earth and incredibly proud to have such a amazing, strong little girl we can call our daughter!

The doctors were amazed at how fast she recovered and told us that not many "Fontan" patients go home this quick.
We are on cloud 2000 :D
Prayers DO work... Nadia is our best prove..Thank God and thanks to you all!

4th update: It was hard seeing Nadia in the PICU again but she is fighting her self back to healthy. They are doing C. Pap trails and if she passes these they will extubate her ventilator in the morning. Please continue to pray for an uneventful good night rest for my beautiful soldier. Thank you for all of your support.. your prayers and encouraging words got used threw the day

She is out of surgery everything went great no complications !! We should be  able to see her in a couple of hours ! God is Good

2nd update : so far so good

1st update

They just got done prepping her for surgery ... We were told to expect a total of 7hours  ..please continue to pray

The cardiac team took her to the OR about an hour ago..we  should get a update shortly

I am feeling extremely vulnerable <-- consider this as my warning to you before continuing reading my post!  
I haven't been able to write a post in the last week.Every time I log in, I stare at the screen and then I log out again. I just can not find the right words to describe of how i have been feeling  .... non less write a whole sentence about it.. so today i will try my best.

We have had Nadia's Pre Op appointment, Wednesday. It lasted 9 hours but Nadia did well for the most part.She had an sedated ECHO, EKG, Vitals, blood work & X-rays done.We then talked to her primary cardiologist and her surgeon. Nadia was really cranky later that night and the following day.

Well, let me tell u a little about what has been going on with Justin,!! He has been dealing with all of this in his own little way.
The last couple of weeks he became really angry with me over every little thing..screams,... whines... talks back and was just for the most part very negative about everything we did.
I really didn't think he would give his sisters heart surgery much thought , boy was i wrong!
Ever since Nadia's birth we talked about her heart, doctors and hospital visits.
He always seemed to understand and be OK with all of it.

This morning, after a tantrum, I send him to his room to think about his negative attitude.
He usually cools off ...comes back down and apologizes after 15-20 minutes.
This time, he didn't come down for at least an hour... so i came to him.
He was curled up in his bed and just looked so sad. I told him that I didn't like the way he is behaving lately and that i needed to know what he was thinking and feeling so we could work on this together.

He sat up and said: " I don't care that Nadia messed up the picture" ( he drew a picture for his grandpa and she drew over it ...which started the tantrum) he continued " I just don't understand why Nadia has to go to the hospital ?..why do u have to all go and I can't?"....i explained again that Nadia's heart would need to be fixed so she can feel better.....he answered " but mom...she is fine..." he started to cry and said " Why can't she just have a whole heart like me?" ... at this point i just cried with him..i just couldn't believe he asked me that.. i really couldn't talk anymore or think of anything to say to him.
What can u say to you six year old son that could make him understand or could make him feel any better about his little sister having open heart surgery ?

After a big breath i told him that all we could do is pray and be very positive about this situation we are in.
Tommy and I decided that we would want Justin to talk to a child life specialist and for her/him to explain it to him in a different way..a way that a six year old could understand more..i have heard they do a wonderful job at it... i am praying that it will do him good! He is such a sweet boy and the best big brother i don't ever want him to change the way he is!

Tommy is dealing with it too... he has been working like crazy, which has helped him some. It is really hard to see him crumble at times. Nadia is Daddy's little girl!

How do i feel??
I feel scared,sad, hurt, drained & nauseated... I feel as if this is a out of body experience.It is unreal that the Fontan surgery is already here..... tomorrow...UGH!
This surgery has proven to be the most challenging one for me. 
U may ask ur self ..what is different about this time and the last two surgery's?

Well, maybe the fact that Nadia is not just a baby anymore.She is able to have conversations with me.. she is able to tell me when she is hungry, sad, happy or hurt. She is my two year old Miss personality. She is my sweet little sensitive princess and my best buddy. She helps me out in the house... no kidding.. she helps me empty's the load of laundry and the dishwasher and even "tries :) " to vacuum ...she stands on her little stool watches me cook and kisses and hugs me when i am hurt ..because she cares and fears for me as much i do care and fear for her.

My relationship with her is so strong... it may sound silly to some people because yes, she is just two, yet our bond is so strong.
A mother/daughter bond that I have once had with my mother. I missed it so much and now that i have it with my daughter, I am just not ready to lose it again... and the thought, that I might could.....is killing me.... it is literally eating me up.

I do have complete trust in her surgeon. I do have complete trust in God. I do! But as strong as I am and as as strong as my faith is ...I catch my self thinking scary thoughts.

" we really didn't see this coming" ... " it was just a freak accident" .." i am so sorry Mr. & Mrs. Dabit"..
these thoughts just play over and over in my head and some days it just makes me drop to my knees.
I can't imagine continuing a day without her in my life.



We are 2nd case tomorrow. Surgery is around noon. I will try my best to keep everyone updated.
Please keep Nadia, Justin, Tommy and Me in your prayers
  

Quick Note

Surgery is rescheduled to the 18th of June. 

Nadia's 2nd Birthday Cake from her Godfather Hana and my sister in law Jeannette :)

Jeannette,Me & Nadia

Me and both of my sister in laws Leaza (Tommy's sister) and Jano ( jeannette)

wow we managed to have one descend picture of us all :)) 

Blowing out candles with mamas help! :) 

Nadia and her Sido (grandpa)

Nadia and one of her Favorite people Amanda or as Nadia likes to call her  (manda) :)

"What's DAT"

Nadia Loves anything that has to do with Micky or Minni

"ohh cuullll (cool) " lol

Sido really liked this present of hers

cool shades

:)

:)

was it that good Tommy?

I want more of what ever that was mom! :)

Ummm ....no comment ;)

Auntie Nora :)

Jano, Nadia & her Godfather Hana

<3

                                                       Happy Birthday sweet Baby 

I am not going to pretend that today is not a Emotional day for me....because it is.I stayed up until midnight to make sure i would be the first to tell her Happy Birthday.. of course she was sleeping so i just whispered it into her tiny ear :)

Justin woke up this morning super excited. He had bought her with his allowance a book from his schools book fair about a month ago and was hiding it until today.

While we were all still sleeping he got her the Gift and her Princess Birthday Card ready...he wrote in it " I Love Nadia... Happy Birthday to Nadia" covered with a bunch of Heart drawings.
He woke her up singing Happy Birthday with a  "waffle cake " and two lit candles.
She had the BIGGEST smile on her face and so did he :) 

I am so sad she is growing up so fast but so happy that she is growing up to be this smart, beautiful, funny, loving, happy and sweet little girl she is right now.
I LOVE her personality, sense of humor and her (sometimes) bad temper :p
She changed our lives for the better and I think i can speak for Tommy & Justin as well...when i say, that our lives are filled with so much more love, happiness, smiles and laughter since God had send her to us.

I am looking forward to celebrate many more birthdays with her and pray that she always stays Happy and Healthy.
I Love you Habibet albi !!

She just woke up

Look how excited she is about her New Book <3

Justin is reading her Birthday card note from him

Nadia at 1 day old

 Nadia's first Birthday

This is a recent Picture of Nadia and one of my Favorite ones

 

The Lemon

Have u ever had the feeling, that something as big as a lemon is just sitting in the middle of your throat? This Lemon has been sitting in my throat for about a month now and it just seems to grow bigger and bigger by the day!

This weekend, Jeannette,Justin, Nadia & I ( Poor Tommy& Hana couldn't leave the Stores) went to cousin Suzie's Wedding... It was Beautiful and we had so much fun... I Love seeing my adopted Family..we always have so much FUN together!

Many of them met Nadia for the very first Time. Of course they couldn't help but fall in Love with her..:)
I was asked about how she is doing and when surgery was ALLOT... I usually have no problem talking about Nadia and her Heart defect.. but the more i was asked about June 7th.. the bigger the Lemon grew...
I held back pretty good..with a smile on my face I told them she would be just fine and asked to keep her in their prayers.

Yesterday on my way home from the gym ...Nadia was singing "we r young" along... she was looking out of the window with a big smile on her face.. she looked so happy.

Observing her from the mirror, i was wondering what she was thinking about...she was probably thinking about the episode of Micky Mouse she loves watching over and over again or maybe which Toy she will play with once she gets home.

I am so thankful she is to young to be thinking about what she will have to endure in just a little over a month...getting her chest cracked open again...having the ventilator put in , morphine, tubes, stitches, tears and pain all over again.... the thought and the fact that i won't be able to do anything about it AGAIN but to stand there, watch, maybe hold her hand.. made this lemon turn into a grenade ....and this grenade exploded in that moment ..

Every single emotion i was holding back over the past month just came bursting out of me ....i pulled over and just lost it for about a good minute.

Nadia started to get upset over me being upset ... i crawled into the back seat, unbuckled her and held her as tight as i could.
She rubbed my back and asked " OK mom?" "huh? mom..OK?"...as if she understood what i was going threw in this moment.
She was so sweet..she kissed my shoulder then held my wet cheeks in her tiny hands and just smiled as if she was telling me...it is going to be all OK.


If i could only trade with her.. if I could only give her my whole Heart and take her Half a Heart instead.
If i could only ...I would do it in a Heartbeat!!!! 


My Lemon is gone for now.. my good Faith &Spirits returned to me.

I just needed a little push ...which in this case was Nadia's beautiful smile.. to remember that God is Good. That God is and has always been Good to us

Keep my sweet Baby in ur prayers

Claudia is here for the Grant Reopening of the Opry mall LOOL






It is 2 am .... Tommy,Hana,Chris & Claudia are playing the Card game "Hand"... my sister flew in from Germany yesterday.
She is telling everyone she is coming to see Justin & Nadia but we both know she is here for the grant reopening of the Opry Mills Mall LOOL ..JK

Dilek, Navi and her Mommy came also today to visit...this is going to be so much fun..I love these Girls!I am so lucky to have a sister that has the opportunity to come visit so often.. even though i am going to miss Tagried & Bishi at this visit!

Anyway it is 2 am and since i am not playing and not tired i read a couple of chapters in my blog from 2010.. and Gosh.. i just realized a Billion typos and so many sentences that i worded just so wrong OR just didn't make any sense...! LOL
I am like.. i wonder what i meant with that!!??
I am not saying that i am a Expert blogger nowb..but u know... much better then when i started.

I am not going back and correct them though....i am so proud of my self ...first that i kept up with Nadia's blog and second that i was able to write a blog in English even though it is not my 1st or 2nd language !

I think it will be fun going back in few years and see how much i have grown from the very first post i wrote. Hopefully in a few years i will be able to write a Post with less spelling Errors ! :)


My Justin Booboo is home sick with an ear infection... he was pitiful these past few days.. Hopefully he wakes up feeling much better!
Nadia....ugh! I just Love her... who doesn't love her?? She is just so lovable!
She is soo soo close talking in real sentences! I really have to video tape her..C her speech is unbelievable! Claudia was talking to her and Nadia just said to her .. "kalto (aunt) pees ( please) hush..ok? Hush Kodia ( Claudia) "... like really?? LOOL

Then Claudia blew her a kiss and Nadia looked at her ...rolled her eyes and said
"Eww Naty (nasty)... i don't know where she got this from! It was too cute and too funny to even pretend to be mad at her for it!!
Ok 2:35 am.. time to hit the sheets...

Sweet Dreams

Nadia 2012


I have had a couple of Family members complaining about me not updating our blog :)..SORRRRRY! I updated about Nadia on my FB page so i felt like i kept everyone always informed.. but they are right.. it is Time and way more fun to read about Nadia on our Blog :)

Nadia Nadia Nadia... Oh Lord.. where should i start....this Girl is HILARIOUS.... Our Big Man up there knew he needed to bless Nadia with a strong will, stubbornness and a sense of humor to master this special life she is living.
She makes us laugh so much.Her speech is getting better and better by the day. She says at least about 50 words and sings about 5 songs. U can understand her pretty well too.
I am going to write down for our future selfs what all she can say right know..the ones i can remember :)
Her Favorite word "No"..lol then "Yes", "stop it"( we hear that on allot too), "move","baby","Toy","eat","cheese","abbal" (apple) "mana" ( banana) "Juzz" (juice) "cookie", "candy",
"cakra" ( cracker), "dance", "sit", "go", "car", "book", "Ed" (read)"potty" (wish she would use it already), "eat", "mai" (arabic water) "atar" (English water lol) "oller" (stroller)"sun", "dog","cat","belly", "ear", "nuss"( nose) "eye", "head", "hurt", "cry", "illo" (pillow) "TV", "pitty" (pretty)"kauka"
(claudia)"Teta" (grandma) "sido" (grandpa)"pay" (play) "hand"... That is all i can think of at this moment:)

She is trying to form sentences like " Daddy sleeben (sleeping)" Or "Jesse (Justin LOL) kick ball" or " mama..Eat food..peees (please)" ...it is amazing to hear her talk and trying to have conversations with me.. i absolutely enjoy listing to her! :)
She is a unstoppable Happy Toddler :) Thank God!!

She is getting Potty trained and thinks her talking Potty is hilarious.. hehe Nadia has changed so much in the last 3 month.. i feel like she completely lost her baby look and she looks like a Big Girl Toddler.. :) She acts like a Big Girl too..
She does not want to sit in her high chair anymore..she wants to sit on her toddler table and eat with a spoon and fork by her self.. can u imaging mow much of a mess she makes? The broom and Mop are my new best friends!! LOL

Everything has been going smooth.. no sickness or complications whats so ever.. we are very blessed.

On Sunday Justin, Nadia & I went to the Movies.. it was Nadia's first Time.. to see "The Lorax". She did so so so good and watched the whole movie.. she kept quiet thanks to all the Goodies i bought. LOL


We have been getting her RSV shots every month..which she is not happy about at all..of course!
She is 50% Tile for her weight and 75% for her length.. which is great.

We also had a cardiology appointment last week and discussed the upcoming Fontan.
It is just crazy to me that we are already here... wow.. times flies by soo soo fast! Nadia was not happy bout having her Echo ( ultrasound) done and because she was crying so much the Ultrasound technician could not get a picture of the Hole between both Chambers.. at the Cath Doctor Doyle felt the whole gotten smaller.
Which is not good because we need the blood to circulate threw both chambers...yes both..the right side is there just super super small.
So Nadia will have a sedated Echo done a day before her surgery to determent if it needs to be opened up a little the day of her surgery. For everyone that wants to know and read about the Fontan Surgery can read about it on herehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fontan_procedure . I feel like this Page is pretty accurate.

So Date is set. June 7th 2012. You know i am not doing great.. but i will be fine.. because i know God send Nadia more then one Angel to look after her :)
I can not wait, not just for Nadia, but for all of us, to be on the other side of this Journey.

With God anything is possible

Please keep us in you prayers

New Years 2012

So usually we Celebrate New Years at my Parents in Laws house. This Year they asked me if i could do it at my house because the were leaving to Florida to catch the Boat to their Cruise to Mexico the day of New Years.
I was excited to throw a little get together and invited a couple of sweet friends.We were going to play Poker and eat all night until midnight :p

On the 29th of January, i had just came threw the Garage Door with my Groceries in my hands, expecting my sister in law to come over... because she had been calling me all day wondering where i was. I thought it was weird she is coming my way again because i just had seen her a day before and she lives in KY..shad no reason to come and she didn't give me an explanation of why she was coming over.

So anyway a minute after i got home someone was ringing my Door Bell like Crazy and knocking at the Door at the same time.
I was so scared because i thought my sister in law is running away from someone or something ..so i rushed to the front door almost tripping over my own feet and when i opened the door . 11 People Screamed "Surpriseeeee"
My Whole Family and two of my friends stood in front of my door laughing and then hugged me. Both my sisters, both of my brother in laws and all four of my sweet Nephews and my Brother who most of them i have not seen in almost 5 years. Who organized the this wonderful surprise were two of our sweet family Friends Navi & Dilek who also came. It was a Top secret mission and i had NOOO cluee!!! :)

I was in disbelieve, overwhelmed & so so Happy to see them all together. I Screamed then i Cried and finally Smiled like a Child on Christmas morning. It was truly a Dream come true.

They told me how they all missed a flight and catched a flight to Ny and then drove all the way to me .. A 18 hour drive.... i felt super Special lool
they didn't stay long at all 5 days and then headed back to Germany.

We had such a great new Year and an unbelievable Time together that i will NEVER forget. Having them here made me realize how much i missed Germany and being around them.. I miss them so much and can't wait to see all of them again.

I Love you all <3