Beautiful Nadia Mariam

Crazy Roller Coaster Ride/ Ventilator out!!!

These past few days have been like crazy ride on a roller coaster.... I do not even know anymore what day it is or what time it is..

Nadia is still in the PICU but is doing really really good.. up until yesterday she was still really puffy and that is what is keeping her in the PICU for so long... they couldn't take the ventilator out until she is less puffy...i was hoping Nadia will only stay in the PICU for at least 3 days but its OK they can keep her as long as they want as long as she doing progress which she is!!!

Today she looks like Nadia again and they even turned her ventilators off and and took the tubes out .. she is taking big breaths by her self... YAY!!!

It is a great feeling seeing her whole face without any wires and tubes again!!!!

She makes those funny faces that reminds me of Justin when he was a baby.. its amazing how much she looks like him!!

Let me tell you about Thursday morning though.. Tommy and I stayed with her Wednesday night and Tommy even got a sleeping room and I slept in the room with her!

Everything was going great.. and all the numbers on the screen were were they suppose to be, due to all the beeping and nurses coming in and out i didn't get much sleep and kept waking up ..so around 5, I woke up and her nurse just told me that they had finished giving her a little bath and that she was doing great.. half awake I gave her a kiss and went back to sleep.. then around 6.30 the nurse woke me up and wanted to let me know what had happened before her shift ended.. so still half asleep I listened.. she started explaining to me that Nadia had sometime after her bath some kind of shake were she put both of her fists up and was shaking for 5 min..I repeat she said 5 min!!!! So I asked her what it could be and tried to find answer that would rule out a seizure... she on the other hand ruled everything out but the seizure... she didn't exactly make a diagnosis but pretty much told me that this is what she thinks she had...I still kept asking her things like what if she was just really cold from taking a bath.. she would say that newborns do not have this kind of reflex... which by the way isn't true i asked!!... then I asked well maybe she has a fever.. she said that babies do get shakes with fever but that Nadia doesn't have a fever...i couldn't think of any other explanation.... my whole body started to shake and i went and woke Tommy up i was hoping that i am just not understanding something right!! When he came to the room one of the Doctors came in.. He just told us what it could be but that he really couldn't relate anything to it since all of her numbers are where they suppose to be.. then he added "well it could be something we missed... maybe some type of abnormality or some kind of bleeding in the brain"...

I felt like throwing up, I left Tommy with Nadia and just started to cry hysterically all the way to my car and home..I do not even know how I made it home driving like this...

Long story short, they ended up doing a head ultrasound and thankfully there were no changes in the brain or anything that could related to a seizure... her Doctor that normally sees her also told me that if it was a seizure that the Doctor there at that moment would not have been able to hold her hands and calm her down.... her hands would have been in a some type of lock....

A huge scare for nothing!! The Nurse that took care of Nadia was so sweet and did a great job over night but i hope she will get in trouble for scaring us like that... maybe that way she wont scare any other parent like she scared us!!!!

Today i got to hold and cuddle my sweet little angel again...I think I enjoyed it more then her =)

Hopefully by end of next week we all be home together!!!!